Spongehood Social

Spongehood Social is a derivative of Sisterhood Social.

Characters:

 * SpongeBob SquarePants
 * Sandy Cheeks
 * Squidward Tentacles
 * Patrick Star
 * Zora
 * Randy
 * Morty

References:

 * Spongehood Social/References

Transcript:

 * [birds chirping]
 * Squidward: [mumbling in sleep] Oh... Are those sweet... carrot... pancakes I smell? [gasp] Mmm, how divine, num num num num. The aroma... spiced warm apple cider. [sniff] Ahh, and, the smell of... smoke... smoke? Smoke?! SMOO— AAH!
 * [fire siren, crashing, yelps]
 * Patrick: Squidward! Rrgh, you ruined the surprise! I was gonna serve you breakfast in bed!
 * Squidward: [sigh]


 * Squidward: [inhales]
 * Mr. Randy: Well! G'mornin', Squidward!
 * Squidward: Father! Mother!
 * Mr. Randy: I'll have you know that Patrick here cooked this yummy lookin' breakfast all on her own.
 * Squidward: I... figured. [sniffs] I didn't know you could burn juice.
 * Mrs. Morty: I've been giving her lessons. I wouldn't be surprised if she's got a cutie mark in fancy cooking by the time we get back from our vacation.
 * Squidward: Vacation? Is that this week? As in 'starting this very instant' this week?! Uurh. Let me guess: apple sauce?
 * Patrick: Nope. Toast! We're gonna have the bestest time two sponges could ever have! I'm gonna go grab my stuff from Dad's wagon.
 * Squidward: So, now, when you say 'a week'... is that, um, seven whole days?
 * Mrs. Morty: And six nights, I know! Such a short time to spend with your little sis.
 * Mr. Randy: You gonna eat that?
 * Squidward: But I've got such a long to-do list. Oh well, I suppose 'spend time with your sponge' will just have to be added to the list.
 * [crash]
 * Patrick: Just a few necessities.


 * [horn honks]
 * Squidward: Now, let's get that kitchen all cleaned up.
 * Patrick: Cleaned up? But we haven't even eaten yet.
 * Squidward: Well now, Patrick, I appreciate the gesture, but we simply can't eat this breakfast; it's burnt.
 * Patrick: It's not that burnt.
 * Squidward: Never fear, my dear, I'll get a proper breakfast going. [hums]
 * Patrick: Can I help?
 * Squidward: Oh, er, of course, er, in one moment, Patrick. Let me just get things started.


 * Patrick: Squidward! I thought you said I was gonna help!
 * Squidward: You are! You... can... put the garnish on the plates.
 * Patrick: You mean this parsley?
 * Squidward: Okay, now, easy! It has to be just right! No need to rush. No! That's too slow. Careful! Back up! Looking for perfection here...
 * Patrick: Whoa, whoa!
 * [crash]
 * Squidward: Not... bad.


 * Squidward: [gasp] There are some things I must attend to. Can you take the dirty towels to the laundry room?
 * Patrick: No problem, I'll make myself useful!


 * Squidward: Patrick!
 * Patrick: I told you I'd make myself useful. Surprised?
 * Squidward: Am I? You washed my incredibly expensive one-of-a-kind designer crocheted wool sweater! Do you know how hard these things are to come by?
 * Patrick: What's the big deal?
 * Squidward: The big deal is that in the heat of the sun, wool... shrinks.
 * Patrick: Oh. Sorry.
 * Squidward: Nng... Well. Back to work. I must create!
 * [splash]
 * Patrick: Sorry?
 * Squidward: Huh. Stay out of trouble, okay? Please?
 * Patrick: I just wanted to do something nice for my sponge.


 * Patrick: Raargh, I'm so bored! When is Squidward gonna finish her work?
 * Squidward: [in Patrick's mind] Stay out of trouble, okay?
 * Patrick: I never got in trouble for drawing. Hmm. This needs something...


 * Patrick: Hi, Squidward! I made a special drawing for y—
 * Squidward: [screams] Oh no! Did you use these gems?!
 * Patrick: Well, yes, but I know you have more in your work room—
 * Squidward: But, but these are extremely rare baby blue sapphires! I need them for an outfit for an extremely important client!
 * Patrick: Oh. Sorry.
 * Squidward: [sigh] Patrick, what am I going to do with you?
 * Patrick: Oh! We could paint together, we could ride bikes, play chess, sing a song, catch frogs, pillow fight—
 * Squidward: That's not what I meant!
 * Patrick: Oh.
 * Squidward: Now I have to go and find some more of these gems!
 * Patrick: I'll go with you and help!
 * Squidward: No! No thank you. You can help by picking up these papers and stacking them, neatly. Put the pens and pencils back exactly where you found them, and please find something to do that doesn't create a large mess for me to clean up!
 * Patrick: Geez Louise, can't I do anything right?


 * Squidward: Patrick! I'm back! Patrick? [gasps in shock]
 * Patrick: Surprise!
 * Squidward: My— ee— bleh— My inspiration room! What did you do? What did you do?!
 * Patrick: When I saw the big mess in your room, I thought I'd clean it up for you.
 * Squidward: This wasn't a mess! It was organized chaos! I was just about finished planning my new fashion line, and, and you, you, you went and, and you— and you put everything away!
 * Patrick: But every time I make a mess, you get upset!
 * Squidward: But this was my mess in my house! And now I have to start from scratch!
 * Patrick: But, I thought it would make you happy!
 * Squidward: Happy?! Happy?! I— [grinds teeth] I just need some time alone. Hm!


 * Sandy: How's the sleepover at Squidward's goin'?
 * Patrick: [mimicking Squidward] Why, it's smashing!
 * Sandy: Huh?
 * Patrick: I just wish we could do something special together that didn't include me goofing anything up.
 * Sandy: The Spongehood Social! SpongeBob an' I do it every year! You an' Squidward can compete against other sponge teams in all these neat events!
 * Patrick: That sounds like the perfect way for us to hang out! Squidward will think it's an excellent idea.


 * Squidward: What a ridiculous idea. A contest at Sweet Apple Acres? It doesn't sound... very... clean.
 * Patrick: So, what, now you're back to hating messes?
 * Squidward: Patrick, watch your tone! I am still your big sponge.
 * Patrick: Right! And any sponge who cares about her sponge goes!
 * Squidward: Patrick...! Honestly! Playing silly little games in the dirt is just... uncouth! With or without a sponge.
 * Patrick: Well then! Maybe, maybe I'll try the Spongehood Social without a sponge! In fact, I think I'll try the rest of my life without a sponge!
 * Squidward: [gasp] Oh, I'm the one who's ruining your life?! Really?! Have you looked around this place? I'm the one who'd be better off with no sponge!
 * Patrick: Well it looks like we finally agree on something! Neither of us needs a sponge!
 * Squidward: Deal!
 * Patrick: Deal! Goodbye, un-sponge!
 * Squidward: Hmph!


 * SpongeBob: 'Uncouth'? She said the Spongehood Social was 'uncouth'?
 * Sandy: Yeah! Uncouth? [belch] Wait. What's uncouth?
 * Patrick: It's not just the Social. She thinks I'm uncouth.
 * SpongeBob: Honey, Squidward thinks everything's uncouth.
 * Sandy: [with mouth full] What's uncouth?
 * SpongeBob: It means uncivil. Y'know, bad mannered?
 * Sandy: [belch]
 * SpongeBob: Exactly. Patrick, just give Squidward some time. She'll come around. Sponges always do.
 * Patrick: Not sponges like Squidward.
 * SpongeBob: Come on, now. Sandy and I got some chores to finish up on. Maybe you can help!
 * Patrick: You sure you want me to help? I just mess everything up!
 * SpongeBob: Oh, come on, that's just stinkin' thinkin'. Watch!
 * SpongeBob and Sandy: [laughing]
 * SpongeBob: Good catch there, Sandy! Whoo!
 * SpongeBob and Sandy: [more laughing]
 * Patrick: This is a chore?
 * SpongeBob: Since we can't sell the bruised apples, we gotta collect them all for the pigs to eat.
 * Sandy: It's a lot of work, so we make a game of it. Wanna try?
 * Patrick: Um, okay. Ow! You're right, it is hard work.
 * Sandy: That's why we do it...
 * SpongeBob and Sandy: Together!
 * Patrick: Huh, Squidward never wants to do chores together.


 * Squidward: Ugh, all that work ruined, thanks to Patrick. Oh my. It's usually a big mess in here. [gasp] Id-ee-a! This is genius! I shall call it 'full spectrum fashions'! If Patrick hadn't— [clears throat] Well, no matter. She still shouldn't have touched my things without permission. Hm!


 * SpongeBob: Sandy! You're up!
 * Patrick: You're... making... grape juice? Squidward would call the fashion police on me if I got grape juice anywhere near her precious outfits.
 * Sandy: Well, that's silly!
 * SpongeBob: Sandy...
 * Patrick: Please, SpongeBob, she didn't mean—
 * Sandy: Whoa! [laughing]
 * SpongeBob: How d'you like them grapes, y'little whippersnapper!
 * Sandy: That tickles! [laughing]


 * Squidward: Now to get these fabrics washed for my fabulous new line. Ooh, my favorite sweater... I just can't believe that Patrick.
 * Zora: [yowls]
 * Squidward: Oh, Zora-wack Hole! It's as if Patrick knew the sweater was perfect for you. And Patrick should consider herself perfectly lucky that this thoughtless mishap turned out all right. Hm.


 * [sheep baaing]
 * SpongeBob: Sandy!
 * Sandy: Got it, sis!
 * Patrick: Wow. It's as if they were just one tropical friend.
 * SpongeBob and Sandy: Yee-haw!
 * SpongeBob: Way to corral some critters, sis!
 * Sheep: You coulda just a-a-a-asked.
 * Patrick: Squidward never high-hoofs me.


 * Squidward: Perfect! Just one more, and this ensemble is fini! Rrgh, Patrick! Where's her silly little arts and crafts project? Oh, Patrick! My one and only sponge! What have I done? All the time I could have spent with you was wasted complaining and wishing you were gone! [crying dramatically] Woe is me! No! I must get her back! I must! As Patience is my witness, I shall never be spongeless again!


 * Squidward: [gasp] Patrick! Oh, I have been galloping all over looking for you. I—
 * Patrick: Oh hello, un-sponge. What are you doing here? Better be careful, you might get some dust on you.
 * Squidward: Oh, Patrick, I want to apologize. I am not better off without a sponge.
 * Patrick: I'm not better off without a sponge either. Spending the day with SpongeBob and Sandy made me realize that.
 * Squidward: Oh, Sweetie, you don't know how happy I am to hear—
 * Patrick: And that's why I'm adopting SpongeBob as my big sponge!
 * Squidward: What?!
 * SpongeBob: What?!
 * Sandy: What?!
 * Patrick: A sponge is someone who loves and takes care of another sponge. SpongeBob's a real sponge.
 * SpongeBob: H-Hold on, Patrick. Don't get ahead of yourself here.
 * Sandy: Besides, she's my big sponge!
 * SpongeBob: Yeah, um—
 * Patrick: [to Squidward] Or maybe she should be your sponge, so she could teach you what a good sponge is supposed to be!
 * SpongeBob: Heh, um, actually, I—
 * Squidward: But I don't need lessons on being a good sponge, I-I promise! Listen! I'll show you how to cook my favorite quiche! Or, or, I'll show you the proper way to beautify your mane. Won't that be fun? Hm?
 * Patrick: Hm! You want me to go home with you, so we can do what you wanna do?
 * Squidward: Uh... yes?
 * Patrick: Just forget it!
 * Sandy: We're still sponges, right?
 * Squidward: Well, that apology went swimmingly. SpongeBob, why do you have to be so good and make me look so bad?
 * SpongeBob: [chuckles] Oh Squidward, once again you're thinkin' about yourself. Bein' sponges is a give and take. You've been doin' a whole lotta takin', but you haven't been doin' a whole lotta givin'.
 * Squidward: But of course I give. I give lessons. Reasonable demands.
 * SpongeBob: But ya never give in. Bein' sponges is like... apple pie. You can have amazin' apples, and you can have a wonderfully crispy crust, but only together you can have a perfect apple pie.
 * Squidward: But apart, all we are is just a pile of mush and some crumbly dry mess... [gasp] I know what I need to do! I just hope it isn't too late!


 * Patrick: Well, I guess it's a good thing Squidward isn't here. Do I see 'uncouth' written all over this contest?
 * Sandy: Look at the size of that pig!
 * SpongeBob: He sure is a cutie.
 * Patrick: That's the last word Squidward would use. [mimicking Squidward] Oh my, what a repulsive monstrosity! This thing needs a head to toe makeover!
 * [trumpet call]
 * SpongeBob: It's almost time!
 * Patrick: Well, you two have fun. Sure wish I had a sponge to run the race with. Huh?
 * Sandy: You do now!
 * SpongeBob: AB and I figured since we do this every year...
 * Sandy: I'd let you borrow my sis so you can give it a try!
 * SpongeBob: Sponge for a day.
 * Patrick: No way!
 * Sandy: One. Day. One. Day.
 * Mrs. Puff: Is this thing on? [to Mr. Krabs] I don't think this thing is on. [to the megaphone] Hello! [Mr. Krabs whispers into her ear] What is the— e— oh. You have to say so. Confangled modern doohickeys. Now, the event you've all been waiting fer! The Sponge Soci— The Socialhood— Oh, dabnabbit, you know, the big race! We have five teams this year fer the event! So y'all head on up to the finish line, y'hear? [Mr. Krabs whispers into her ear] [to Mr. Krabs] Eh? [to the megaphone] The start line! [to Mr. Krabs] That's what I said.
 * Patrick: That's us.
 * Sandy: One. Day. Good luck!
 * Mrs. Puff: And may the best sponges win! On your marks... get set... Gooooo!
 * SpongeBob: [yelps]
 * Patrick: You okay, SpongeBob?


 * Patrick: SpongeBob, help!


 * Patrick: You can do it, sponge!


 * [tropical friends cheering]
 * Sandy: Ooh, so close! You almost won!
 * Patrick: Thank you, SpongeBob! You were amazing! I don't even care that we didn't win. This was so much fun! Huh? Squidward?! Wait, where's SpongeBob?
 * SpongeBob: [deep breath]
 * Patrick: I don't get it.
 * SpongeBob: [chuckles] We switched places over at the very first mudhole.
 * Patrick: So, we did the whole competition... together?
 * Squidward: That we did, little sponge. Well, except for the start line.
 * Sandy: But you finished together!
 * Patrick: You mean... you were all in on it?
 * SpongeBob, Sandy and Squidward: Mm-hmm.
 * Patrick: You did this for me?
 * Squidward: Us. I did it for us. You see? We are apple pie!
 * Patrick: Huh?
 * Squidward: Uh, I'll explain later. For now, I think we deserve a celebration!
 * SpongeBob, Sandy and Patrick: Yeah!
 * Patrick: Where?
 * Squidward: The spa, of course.
 * SpongeBob, Sandy and Patrick: [laughing]
 * Patrick: Oh, Squidward.
 * Squidward: No, I-I-I'm serious.


 * Squidward: Very well then, what should we write to the Princess?
 * Patrick: I'll start. Having a sponge is just about the bestest thing in the world. But it sure isn't the easiest.
 * Squidward: I agree that being sponges is a wonderful thing, but it takes teamwork. Sometimes it's about compromising. Sometimes it's about accepting each others' differences. But mostly, it's about having fun together. Even if it means getting your hood a little bit dirty.
 * Patrick: A lot dirty.
 * Squidward: A little bit dirty.
 * Patrick: A lot dirty.
 * Squidward: A little bit dirty!
 * Patrick: A lo—
 * Zora: Hold it, hold it! How about "a medium amount of dirty, not too little, not too much, just right"?
 * Squidward and Patrick: Deal!
 * [birds chirping]


 * [music]
 * [credits]