Pranks-A-Squirrel


 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick walk up to the Palace of Pranks.]
 * SquirrelBob: Well, Startrick, here it is, the Palace of Pranks, the greatest novelty shop in Bulldog Bottom. All the greatest pranksters shop here. This is where I got my gag... [the scene shows a close up of the can of Seanut Brittle.] seanut brittle can.
 * Startrick: Oh, boy, Seanut Brittle. Gimmie!
 * [Startrick tries to open the can.]
 * SquirrelBob: Startrick, wait, it's a booby trap, remember?
 * Startrick: Nice try, SquareSquirrel, but it's not gonna work this time. I'm gonna have some of your delicious Seanut Brittle! [opens the can and purple tubes pop out of the can] Where's the Seanut Brittle?
 * SquirrelBob: [laughs] That gets funnier every time you say it, Startrick. Come on, let's go inside.
 * [SquirrelBob walks off screen.]
 * Startrick: [starting to cry] Seanut Brittle?
 * [SquirrelBob enters the Palace of Pranks and smells the air.]
 * SquirrelBob: Ah! [Startrick enters the scene] Nothing compares to the smell of cheap plastic novelty items. [an aisle is shown] Pranks, gags, and gross-out toys as far as the eye can see! [walks down an aisle] Isn't it everything I said it would be, Startrick?
 * Startrick: [in another aisle] Hey, Seanut Brittle! [purple tubes appear popping above the aisle that Startrick is in] Oh, darn it, not again!
 * [The scene only shows SquirrelBob in his aisle. SquirrelBob laughs. An old fish named Robopina enters the scene.]
 * Robopina: Good to see you, SquirrelBob. How's my number one customer doing?
 * SquirrelBob: Great, Robopina. This is my friend Startrick. He wants to become a prankster, too.
 * Robopina: [walks up to Startrick] Well, pleasure to meet you, Startrick. [shakes Startrick's hand, but Robopina has a joy buzzer, so it shocks Startrick. Startrick screams and sucks on his hand. Robopina laughs.] That's your first lesson, son, the granddaddy of all pranks. The joy buzzer.
 * Startrick: I don't get it.
 * Robopina: You don't have to get it. The prank is for the enjoyment of the prankster.
 * SquirrelBob: You see, Startrick, Robopina here is the master. I learned all I know about pranks from him. [he and Startrick walk to the checkout counter and Robopina is behind it.] Okay, Robopina, let's see what you've got.
 * Robopina: Well, this came in just this morning. [shows a package of gum] Have some gum. [Startrick chews the gum but then he screams as his head explodes] Ha! Exploding chewing gum. Only $9.95.
 * Startrick: [His head is gone, leaving a neck bone in the shape of a femur and he talks muffled] I don't get it.
 * SquirrelBob: [takes out a dollar.] What can we get for one dollar?
 * Robopina: One dollar will get you this fake gag dollar-- [takes out a fake dollar] fool your friends into thinking you've got a real dollar.
 * SquirrelBob: What else have you got?
 * [Robopina holds up a whoopee cushion.]
 * Robopina: A whoopee cushion.
 * SquirrelBob: Nah.
 * [Robopina holds up fake vomit.]
 * Robopina: Fake vomit.
 * SquirrelBob: No.
 * [Part of the counter is covered in real vomit.]
 * Robopina: Real vomit?
 * SquirrelBob: Eww! Don't you have anything good?
 * Robopina: Well, there is one prank that I've been saving for a real top of the line prankster. [shows close up of a spray can] Invisible Spray!
 * SquirrelBob: Wow, invisible spray!
 * Startrick: But I can see it.
 * SquirrelBob: Gee, Startrick, just think of the pranks we could pull with this.
 * [SquirrelBob gives Robopina some money.]
 * Robopina: Good choice. Now be careful with that stuff, boys. It stains clothes.
 * SquirrelBob: Thanks, Robopina. [he and Startrick walk off-screen. The scene changes to show SquirrelBob and Startrick outside.] Here it is, Startrick. The ultimate prank-- invisible spray.
 * Startrick: What are we gonna do with it?
 * SquirrelBob: I know! We'll go spray the park bench and then sit on it, and when people walk by, we'll be floating in midair.
 * [They both think about sitting on an invisible bench, surrounded by Robopine, Mark McGrath, Seashell, Muppet, Omarion, and Nick.]
 * Robopine: They're floating in midair!
 * Seashell: How do they do that?
 * [The thought bubble disappears.]
 * Startrick: That's the ultimate prank! Good idea, SquirrelBob!
 * [Startrick gives SquirrelBob a thumbs up.]
 * SquirrelBob: Well, let's get started.
 * [Startrick takes off his shorts.]
 * Startrick: Okay, I'm ready.
 * [Startrick drops his Squirrel on the ground.]
 * SquirrelBob: Any particular reason you took your Squirrel off?
 * Startrick: Well, that stuff stains clothes, right?
 * SquirrelBob: That it does, Startrick, that it does. Good thinking. Here, hold this a second. [Startrick takes the can of spray while SquirrelBob takes off his Squirrel. Startrick hugs the can.] Okay, Startrick, give me the can.
 * Startrick: I think since spraying the park bench was my idea, I should get to spray it.
 * SquirrelBob: Startrick, spraying the park bench was my idea.
 * Startrick: Yeah, but I said it was a good idea!
 * SquirrelBob: Give me that thing.
 * [SquirrelBob grabs the can and he and Startrick wrestle over it. SquirrelBob accidentally sprays their clothes and they disappear]
 * Startrick: Hey, the invisible spray works!
 * [A tour bus drives up.]
 * Mark McGrath: And on your right, if you look, you'll see two naked guys fighting over a can of paint!
 * [The passengers laugh and Mark McGrath laugh. The bus drives off. SquirrelBob covers his lower half]
 * SquirrelBob: Oh my gosh, Startrick, help me find our clothes!
 * [SquirrelBob pats the ground, trying to grab the clothes. Startrick sprays SquirrelBob's right hand and it disappears]
 * Startrick: I gotta hand it to you, SquirrelBob. You look kinda funny.
 * [Startrick laughs and SquirrelBob screams.]
 * SquirrelBob: Righty, where are you? [Startrick laughs again.] No one messes with Righty! [takes the spray can with his invisible hand.] We'll see how you like it! [sprays Startrick making a hole in the middle of his body] Kind of gives you an empty feeling, huh?
 * [Startrick takes the can.]
 * Startrick: Yeah. [He sprays SquirrelBob's upper left corner.] I see what you mean.
 * [SquirrelBob takes the spray can and sprays Startrick's lower half.]
 * SquirrelBob: No guts, no glory! [laughs]
 * French Narrator: Several bad puns later...
 * [The scene returns to SquirrelBob and Startrick, who are now invisible. Startrick shakes the can.]
 * Startrick: Oh, hey, I think this thing is empty.
 * [SquirrelBob grabs the can and shakes it.]
 * SquirrelBob: Oh, no, it can't be! How are we going to pull off the ultimate prank? Thanks a lot, Startrick. You used the last of it.
 * [SquirrelBob throws the can far away.]
 * Startrick: Hey, I think I found our Squirrel. [a ripping noise is heard] Oops! Here, these are yours.
 * SquirrelBob: Oh, forget the Squirrel, Startrick. Let's get home and wash this paint off.
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick walk off somewhere.]
 * Startrick: Hey, SquirrelBob, do you know what time it is?
 * SquirrelBob: Oh sure, it's... half past invisible.
 * Startrick: Gee, it's getting late.
 * [They walk up behind Robopine.]
 * SquirrelBob: Let's ask this guy. Excuse me, sir, but do you have the time?
 * Robopine: Sure. [looks at his watch] It's, uh, ten to three.
 * SquirrelBob: Thank you.
 * Robopine: Don't mention it.
 * [Robopine turns around to notice there is seemingly no one there.]
 * Startrick: Don't mention what?
 * Robopine: Uh, who said that?
 * Startrick: Me.
 * Robopine: [screams] Ghosts!
 * [Robopine runs away from them; his eyes pop out. His eyes scream, jump into a car and drive away.]
 * Startrick: Hey, I'm no ghost! Well, the nerve of that guy and his driving eyeballs!
 * SquirrelBob: Wait a second, Startrick, my brain just hatched an idea.
 * Startrick: Lay it on me.
 * SquirrelBob: Okay, we're invisible, right?
 * Startrick: Yeah.
 * SquirrelBob: If that guy thought we were ghosts, we could haunt everybody in Bulldog Bottom. Oh, it's the ultimate prank.
 * SquirrelBob and Startrick: Whoo! High five!
 * [They give each other a high five]
 * SquirrelBob: Let's go scare some suckers!
 * [The scene changes to show Hanson's treedome. The scene then shows her reading a book in a rocking chair in her tree. She hears a noise, which is SquirrelBob and Startrick's laughter. She checks to see what it is, but there is supposedly nothing there. She gets up and goes to her window.]
 * Hanson: Huh? [the outside of her tree is shown] Well, that's funny, I thought I heard voices. Huh? [walks up to a glass of juice on the floor] I thought I left that glass of peanut juice on the table. [walks over to a table with a lamp covered in garbage] And didn't I toss that old lamp out yesterday? And since when did I acquire all these portraits of Startrick?
 * [Photos of Startrick are on the walls and tables, and the rug has his face on it. Hanson turns around and sees SquirrelBob and Startrick covered in white sheets over their heads as they wail.]
 * SquirrelBob and Startrick: We're ghosts.
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick wail again. Hanson laughs.]
 * Hanson: I knew it was you guys! Alright, the joke's over. Take off the sheets. [pulls off the sheets and notices there is nothing there, then gasps] It is ghosts!
 * [Hanson screams. She takes out a remote with a large red button. She pressed the button and an escape pod that is in the shape of an acorn appears out of some panels. She enters the escape pod and presses a button. The escape pod flies out of her dome, above the water, past the Bulldog Bottom island, and lands in Texas. The escape pod explodes in Texas. SquirrelBob and Startrick leave Hanson's house, laughing.]
 * SquirrelBob: Boy, we really scared her!
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick laugh.]
 * Startrick: Who's gonna be our next victim?
 * SquirrelBob: A better question would be, "Who isn't?"
 * [The scene changes to show Mrs. Orca's house, where she is preparing to eat a piece of cake.]
 * Mrs. Orca: Double-dark deep-sea light diet cake! [laughs] You will soon be mine. [Startrick and possibly SquirrelBob eats/eat the cake, making it look like ghosts have eaten it. Startrick's face is covered in cake. He belches loudly and wipes it off.] Oh! [gets filled up with air and then lets it out flying all around] Ghosts!
 * [Her deflated body lands on the table. The scene changes to show Nick Cannon painting and humming to himself at his house. SquirrelBob and/or Startrick takes the paint brush, making it look like it is floating in mid air.]
 * Nick Cannon: Huh?
 * [SquirrelBob and/or Startrick paint(s) a mustache under Nick Cannon's nose. The two wail ghostly. Nick Cannon crashes through the wall and runs away.]
 * Nick Cannon: Ghosts!
 * [The scene changes to show Wiz Khalifa surfing at Goo Lagoon. SquirrelBob and Startrick surf up to Wiz Khalifa, making it look like a surfboard is on a wave by itself.]
 * SquirrelBob and Startrick: [Speaking in ghostly voices] Cowabunga!
 * Wiz Khalifa: Ghosts!
 * [Wiz Khalifa screams while falling off the board.]
 * [JoJo appears waving her arms wildly.]
 * JoJo: Ghosts!
 * [Bobby Brown appears with his eyes bugging out of his head.]
 * Bobby Brown: Ghosts!
 * [Kermit the Frog appears, scared with arms on his head.]
 * Kermit the Frog: Ghosts!
 * [Seashell appears in a sort of screaming position.]
 * Seashell: Ghosts!
 * [Raccoon appears holding a piece of toast.]
 * Raccoon: Toast.
 * [Tamera Mowry-Housley appears sitting on the toilet, appearing freaked out.]
 * Tamera Mowry-Housley: Ghosts!
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick are reading newspapers. SquirrelBob laughs.]
 * SquirrelBob: It's official: we're the greatest pranksters ever. The whole town thinks we're ghosts.
 * [Startrick is holding his newspaper upside down]
 * Startrick: Yeah.
 * SquirrelBob: There's only one guy left to scare, and we'll have pranked everybody in Bulldog Bottom-- [An article is shown it reads, "Piglets Last To Be Haunted! says, 'I ain't afraid of no ghosts'"] Mr. Piglets.
 * [The same article is shown on Startrick's paper, but it is upside down.]
 * Startrick: It says he isn't scared of ghosts.
 * [SquirrelBob is "shown"]
 * SquirrelBob: We'll see about that!
 * [The scene changes to show the Pigsty Piglet at night. Mr. Piglets peers out of the blinds.]
 * Mr. Piglets: Ghosts? Ha! I ain't afraid of no ghosts! Every sailor knows a ghost won't come near a fella as long as he's wearing his spotted neckerchief... [grabs a handkerchief] And his dried-up sea leprechaun. [shows ashes of the sea leprechaun] And a bit of gold never hurt. [shows a gold necklace around Mr. Piglets neck that reads, "Foxy"] But to be on the safe side, I'm also wearing me Squirrel in a melvin knot, [his underwear is strung up with rope] got me shivering timber brace, [shows his ankles chained together] and the hairs on the back of me neck are taped down. [a strip of duct tape covers the hair. Mr. Piglets is shown wearing a barrel and a headpiece with lanterns hung on it.] And I'm all wrapped up in a suit of anti-ghost armor. And if none of this stuff works, I've got me secret weapon—the specter deflector! [holds up a paddle ball] So just try and get me, you ghosts! Bring it on.
 * [The lights black turn off. SquirrelBob and Startrick wail ghostly.]
 * SquirrelBob and Startrick: [As they open the front door] Piglets!
 * Mr. Piglets: Wha?
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick toss over a table and barrel. They pick up a barrel and a table to make it look like they are floating.]
 * SquirrelBob: Piglets, we've come to haunt you.
 * [Mr. Piglets uses the specter detector (paddle ball) by bouncing the stringed ball back and forth from the paddle board.]
 * Mr. Piglets: Stay back, I'm well-armed!
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick moan ghostly. SquirrelBob and Startrick walk by with a barrel, making it look like it is floating by. Mr. Piglets hits the ball faster.]
 * Mr. Piglets: I'm warning ya!
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick moan. SquirrelBob or Startrick stops the ball. SquirrelBob or Startrick then cuts the string.]
 * Mr. Piglets: [shivering] Ooh!
 * SquirrelBob and Startrick: [quietly] Boo.
 * [Mr. Piglets breaks out of his armor and screams.]
 * Mr. Piglets: I gotta get out of here!
 * [He runs to the doors, but they don't open.]
 * SquirrelBob: You can't escape, Piglets. We've glued the door shut.
 * [The door is held closed with a long strip of glue. The scene shows the side of the Pigsty Piglet.]
 * Mr. Piglets: [off-screen] You'll never get me!
 * [Mr. Piglets tries to break through the window, but instead of shattering, the window stretches like elastic and slingshots him backwards, and he crashes into a table]
 * Startrick: Nice try, Piglets, but we replaced all the glass with rubber!
 * [Mr. Piglets dives into the toilet, but gets stuck. He pulls himself out and sits on the floor, dazed]
 * SquirrelBob: Too late, Piglets, we've already clogged all the toilets. [The toilet is stuffed with toilet paper. Mr. Piglets cowers in a corner.]
 * Mr. Piglets: Please, spirits, leave me be.
 * [Startrick laughs.]
 * Startrick: [while Mr. Piglets is incoherently begging for his life] We got him good, SquirrelBob.
 * SquirrelBob: [while Mr. Piglets is incoherently begging for his life] Wait, Startrick, I've got one more idea. [to Mr. Piglets] You're going to pay, Piglets.
 * Mr. Piglets: [shaking with fear] No, spirits, please!
 * SquirrelBob: Pay!
 * [a dollar floats in the air]
 * Mr. Piglets: No!
 * SquirrelBob: [high-pitched] Pay! [lights a match]
 * Mr. Piglets: No! Don't burn me dollar! [grabs a bucket of water and throws it at the dollar. The water drips on SquirrelBob and Startrick, making them reappear. They laugh, not noticing they're visible.] Well, well, well, if it isn't SquirrelBob and Startrick.
 * SquirrelBob: [wiggling his arms and legs like a ghost] I know not these names of which you speak.
 * [Startrick looks down and notices that he is visible.]
 * Startrick: Uh, SquirrelBob. SquirrelBob, we're visible again. [SquirrelBob looks down, then he and Startrick scream and cover their lower halves. Mr. Piglets lifts them up by the back of their necks as they try to run.]
 * Mr. Piglets: So you two are the Bulldog Bottom ghosts.
 * SquirrelBob: We're really sorry, Mr. Piglets. Please don't chop us into little pieces and eat 'em.
 * [Mr. Piglets puts them down.]
 * Mr. Piglets: Hey, come on, boys, I'm hip! I pulled my share of pranks when I was your age. Had me some laughs. That's what we did tonight, right? We had a good laugh. Come on, laugh with me. [they all laugh.] Uh, any particular reason you boys are naked?
 * SquirrelBob: Yeah, the invisible paint stains clothes.
 * [Mr. Piglets laughs]
 * Mr. Piglets: Of course it does. Well, you two better hurry home before someone sees ya nude.
 * SquirrelBob: Yeah, I think I'd die of embarrassment if that happened.
 * Startrick: Me too.
 * Mr. Piglets: Woo, now we wouldn't want that, would we? It's getting late now. You two pranksters better get going.
 * SquirrelBob: Mr. Piglets, thanks for being such a good sport.
 * Mr. Piglets: [off-screen] Don't mention it.
 * [SquirrelBob and Startrick walk into the dining area.]
 * SquirrelBob: That Mr. Piglets, always looking out for me. What a guy.
 * Startrick: Yeah.
 * [A white, round light shines on SquirrelBob and Startrick. The scene pans out to show a crowd of people consisting of: Mark McGrath, Wiz Khalifa, Mrs. Orca, Hanson, Nick Cannon, Muppet, Tamera Mowry-Housley, Robopine Waters, the red shirt Robopina, Tyrese Gibson, Grandpa Monster, Robopine, Bobby, Purple Caitlyn Jenner, Hans, Nick Lachey, an Orca, two Danny Trejos, Nick, and Caitlyn.]
 * Mr. Piglets: The Pigsty Piglet presents... live nude pranksters! [He is shown shining the light on them from the crow's nest] Starring the Bulldog Bottom Ghosts!
 * [Robopine, Grandpa Monster, Tamera Mowry-Housley, Nick Lachey, Russian Dolls, and Robopina are shown cheering. SquirrelBob and Startrick scream while trying to cover themselves up. Mr. Piglets laughs teasingly. Hanson whistles at them as Mrs. Orca takes a picture. Nick Cannon laughs. SquirrelBob and Startrick keep trying to cover themselves.]
 * SquirrelBob: Startrick!
 * Startrick: Yeah?
 * SquirrelBob: [Scene cuts to the outside of the Pigsty Piglet] We should have bought the whoopee cushion! [SquirrelBob lets out a crying yell as the episode ends. A person wolf whistles in cheers.]